SKU: 73549772808

Apocalyptic Queen #485 Kids "Not Hot" Sauce

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Description

Apocalyptic Queen #485 Kids "Not Hot" SauceNot Hot Sauce Training Wheels for Future Spice Lords Not Hot Sauce is what you get when you want all the chaos of Apocalyptic Rations flavor with none of the fire department involvement. This bottle is built for tiny rebels, spice cowards, and flavor fans who want zero burn and maximum drip. Cane sugar, peaches, and red chili puree come together to make a sweet, tangy glaze that tastes like a fruit stand that survived the apocalypse. Tomatoes, jalapeo

“Not Hot” Sauce – Training Wheels for Future Spice Lords

“Not Hot” Sauce is what you get when you want all the chaos of Apocalyptic Rations flavor with none of the fire department involvement.

This bottle is built for tiny rebels, spice cowards, and flavor fans who want zero burn and maximum drip. Cane sugar, peaches, and red chili puree come together to make a sweet, tangy glaze that tastes like a fruit stand that survived the apocalypse. Tomatoes, jalapeño peppers, cayenne, and capsicum oil are present in micro-doomsday doses, just enough to bring authentic chili flavor without lighting a single tongue on fire.

Vidalia onions (1.34% by weight, because we’re nerds) plus minced onion and salt lend that mellow, caramel-y, savory note, while vinegar keeps it bright and dippable. Smooth, clingy texture that coats nuggets, fries, and anything your future hot sauce fiend is willing to test.

This is the gateway bottle. Today, “Not Hot.” Tomorrow… Scorpion Dust.

Flavor Profile:

  • Sweet: Cane sugar, peaches, and tomato for candy-adjacent glaze vibes

  • Tangy: Vinegar and chili puree keep it bright, not boring

  • Savory: Vidalia onions, minced onion, and salt for gentle umami depth

  • Chili Flavor, Zero Fear: Red chili, jalapeño, cayenne, and capsicum oil in baby-step amounts

Heat Level: NONE
All flavor, no fire. Approved for kids, grandparents, and people who think black pepper is “a lot.”

Best Deployed On: Chicken nuggets, fries, tater tots, mac and cheese, grilled cheese, pizza crusts, rice bowls, and any bland post-collapse snack in desperate need of sweet, tangy, zero-risk chaos.

Ingredients: Water, Cane Sugar, Red Chili Puree, Vinegar, Peaches, Jalapeno Peppers, Salt, Minced Onion, Tomatoes, Vidalia Onions, Cayenne Pepper, Xanthan Gum, And Capsicum Oil.

Refrigerate After Opening. 1.34% Vidalia Onion by Weight. May Contain Pits.

Shipping Notes
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Exchange/Return Notes
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SKU: 73549772808

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Michelle K
Louisville, US
★★★★★ 5
Gentle soap, great for hands and body!
I love how gentle this oatmeal soap is. It’s perfect for sensitive skin and doesn’t irritate my hands even when they are rough. I keep one at my sink and one in the shower. The natural scent is lovely and not overpowering. A must-buy for those looking for a mild cleanser!
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Reviewed in the United States on February 3, 2026
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seekro
Whiting, US
★★★★★ 5
Itchy, red skin BE GONE!
My 94 year old father has recently had a terrible resurfacing of his psoriasis with red, itchy, flaky sores all over his body! It's been so bad that he can't even sleep at night. My heart has been aching for him BUT he is finally getting some relief from this amazing soap!! I just saw him yesterday and, compared to two weeks ago, the redness and itching has lessened considerably. Plus, he loves the way it smells! What a true JOY to know he is on the mend, in part because of this product. I am about to purchase another bar for my sister who suffers the with the same issue. THANK YOU fo making a product that actually does what it claims to do!!!!!!
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Reviewed in the United States on December 26, 2025
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Raizy G
Carnegie, US
★★★★★ 5
Great Product
I’ve been using this all-natural eczema soap for the past few weeks, and I’m genuinely impressed by the results. As someone who has struggled with eczema flare-ups for years, I’ve tried countless products, but this soap stands out. First off, the ingredients are truly natural—no harsh chemicals, fragrances, or preservatives. The soap is made with soothing, skin-friendly components like coconut oil, shea butter, and chamomile extract. It lathers up nicely, creating a gentle, creamy foam that feels luxurious on the skin. What really stands out is how gentle it is on my sensitive skin. Unlike many other soaps I’ve tried, this one doesn’t dry out or irritate my eczema patches. In fact, it has a calming effect and seems to reduce redness and itching after just a few uses. I’ve noticed that my skin feels softer and more hydrated, which has helped prevent flare-ups. The scent is mild and pleasant—not overpowering, but just enough to give you a fresh, clean feeling without triggering any sensitivities. Overall, I’m thrilled with this eczema soap. It’s not only effective at soothing and moisturizing my skin, but it’s also a relief to know that I’m using something that’s completely natural and safe. If you suffer from eczema or other skin sensitivities, I highly recommend giving this soap a try. It’s definitely become a staple in my daily skincare routine.
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Reviewed in the United States on January 5, 2025
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mary l
Draper, US
★★★★★ 5
eczema soap
this is the best soap for my grandson he has eczema , cleared his skin after one or two baths then i lotion down with with the eczema lotion and his skin is so smooth and it's actually beautiful I will always bath him in this soap again and forever he doesn't inch anymore ,no more broken skin it holds moisture because it kind of seems like it's dry when you take taking out of bath but it healing up patches of dry skin I was happy to go see them go away but it's penetrates in the skin I don't know it's just remove all roughness no more problems thanks excellent products and
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Reviewed in the United States on September 19, 2025
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Stephen C
Massapequa, US
★★★★★ 4
Expensive, but works if you have a skin condition.
Expensive, but good soap if you have a rash.
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Reviewed in the United States on November 3, 2025

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